What Did You Say?!

This week we've been talking about 4 different theories used in family studies. They are: Family Systems Theory (analyze the whole not just the individual parts), Exchange Theory (you at least get back what you put in), Symbolic Interaction Theory (our perspective/how we interpret the symbols/signals we receive), and Conflict Theory (power struggles between genders or social classes).  The one I've been thinking about most is the Symbolic Interaction Theory. We all use symbols to communicate with one another whether it's words, how we say something, our body language, if we roll our eyes, or fold our arms etc. All of these are symbols and as we all have experienced these symbols are often times misunderstood or misinterpreted. So why do we misunderstand people so often? Why is our communication deficient between one another? It all has to do with the different experiences we have all had. For example, I can say something to my husband and he takes it a completely different way then I meant it because he might have a certain experience attached to that certain phrase. I may have a positive experience attached to the phrase, but perhaps he doesn't. It made me realize the importance of communication! If we don't communicate with one another no one can understand us or our feelings or what we're doing and why we're doing it. There needs to be a certain amount of communication so that the symbols we're sending and receiving don't get mixed up as much. This is especially important in a marriage and in a family. People get their feelings hurt all the time or get upset because of something a spouse/sibling does. We naturally think that they do it on purpose, but really they have a reason for feeling how they feel or for doing something. I, myself, am horrible at communicating. I never say why I'm doing something or why or what I'm feeling. I need to do better at explaining things to my husband, in particular, so that he understands me and where I’m coming from so we can be on the same page with each other.