Marital Intimacy

We've all been taught from the time that we are young that you should only have sex when you are married. Any such activity outside of marriage is wrong. And it is - it is wrong to engaged in sexual intimacy before marriage, but people never tend to talk about why such intimacy is encouraged in a marriage. We are taught that sex is bad so many believe that it is a bad thing. Some people even feel guilty for having sex after they get married. We and our future children need to understand that marital intimacy is approved and is such a good, and critical thing when used appropriately. Intimacy in marriage brings a husband and a wife closer together. It is a way for them to express their love for one another and to help the other feel safe and secure. Sexual intimacy in marriage is such a wonderful, sacred, spiritual experience. This should be communicated to the youth so that they fully understand sex and love. So many teens, and even adults, think that love and sex are two unrelated events - that one night stands are acceptable to fulfill intimacy needs. In an article/pamphlet by Barbara Dafoe Whitehead and Marline Pearson called Making a Love Connection it says,

"For another reason, teenagers also lack what earlier generations took for granted: a normative sequence for the timing of sex, marriage, and parenthood. Today's teens struggle in a culture that no longer tells them how these three events should be sequenced or what the optimal sequence might be."

Teens today don't understand sex and it's timing or purposes because they are not taught about it. This kind of teaching should be first taught in the home to ensure proper teaching. If we don't teach our children the proper use of sex the world will teach them its views.I know it is an uncomfortable and awkward conversation to have with teenagers, but it must be done. The more teens understand the doctrine and purposes of sex they more responsible they will be with it. If you don't know where to begin or how to talk to your child about sexual intimacy I suggest you read this article by Matthew O. Richardson called Teaching Chastity and Virtue. It outlines six strategies for teaching your children about sexual intimacy.